God is sure faithful! Have you ever noticed that? You probably have, because I don't really know how one could not see His faithfulness. Really. He is just that faithful. Which by the way completely blows my mind.
I was remembering how I felt right before I was about to leave for Berlin. I was so nervous the week before! Many promised to be in prayer for me all along the trip and I was given nothing but encouragement. Still, my heart was uneasy. What would it be like? What was there that I could do on a mission trip? So many questions and doubts filled my mind.
I think it was really two nights before I was to leave that I began to feel the peace which I so desperately longed for. I had always felt peace about me going, I really felt inside that this mission trip was something God had planned for me. But I was getting caught up in all the fears and doubts that can weigh one down.
I went for a walk 2 nights before, just because I felt like I needed some quiet time to be with God. Time to just think. He was so faithful and met me right there! As I was spilling my heart to Him, telling him all my fears and uncertainties, He gave me an overwhelming peace. He placed on my heart the verse Isaiah 41:10, my favorite Bible verse. I felt so much peace in that promise and I was again reminded that His grace is enough. I realized that I may never feel ready to do what I did, but I didn't really need to be. All I could do was turn to God and realize that His strength was what I needed, not my own. I knew that He had this trip planned for me long ago, before I was born actually. And knowing that brought me so much comfort. Just knowing He is God. I found so much peace in the knowledge that He would go behind and before me.
Maybe some wouldn't want to feel that way before a mission trip. Honestly, I didn't want to. At the time. But I now realize I wouldn't have had it any other way. I am so thankful that God showed me that I was not the reason I was heading to Germany. He was. And He was the only One who could give me what I needed on that trip. His grace had been enough for me in the past, and there was no reason it wouldn't cover me in the future. His grace was definitely enough.
It always is.
1 comment:
That's my life verse too! When it was read at Lillian's funeral, I felt this overwhelming calm wash over me. God truly uses that verse as a love note to many of us in our darkest times. Thanks for sharing your story.
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